Is there a type of function where every point has exactly one tangent line passing through it? If yes, what is this type of function called?
13.06.2025 04:43
“You’re not related to that, ah, “Lydia” person are you, incidentally? We need to know, (trailing off) for the records and so on”. BeepBeepBeep. “Hello, yes, it’s all under control:—(muffled) Look, I just had to say that under the provisions of Act 001 subclause [978–981] (pause) for the purposes of gathering information and which I’m currently engaged in right now thankyouverymuch, so, yes, if you wouldn’t mind”. Yes, ah, so where we’re we? Yes, cousins and brothers, known associates etc.? It’s just for the computers you understand, I don’t need to know, you know. When there’s an asterixed field and it’s not filled out, well the whole thing just grinds to a halt. Anyway, the ancestry of your ancestry?”
“Look, as MP’s, for issues of national security we have that all taken care of: In fact Benji recently sold us a VPN system that’s absolutely secure: “Safe as Houses”. Also, for a low 10 Billion they gave us a system by which all of Australia’s most sensitive data is now stored in some cloud somewhere. Also it’s an invisible cloud. No Australian can access the data:—that ensures absolute security. Money well spent, that’s for sure. That computer there is uploading as we speak”
(muffled: “Can we arrest this schmuck? (pause) What? (pause) Why not? (pause) Yeah, just keep an eye on him… yeah yeah we don’t want anyone rocking the boat yada yada…(pause) Yes, of course I know what that means!:—No moving from side to side, in public at least, because of possible earthquake phenomena. As if we haven’t got enough on our plate already! Then there’s the issue that terrorists might start moving from side to side in concert with each other. Possibly in sync by some timing signal that could be disseminated over the radio if not by TV. OK so we’re going to have to, ban everything, but we’ll start with um, communication and music. See how we go. Howzat? (pause) Hello? Damn:— They hung up!:—I was going to ask, what about people moving from side to side, in private?:—Do we need more legislative support, and technical, ah, capabilities to monitor such behaviour. It’s for the good of the whole community. Bugger it, we’ll just do it and get the permission later”.
“Well, don’t they say we all come from a common ancestor? Anycase I think I’m Lydonian”.
“We don’t know that. In any case, as (PM) Menzies said, (before the 1952 Emu Plains (SA) and Maralinga (SA) Nuclear Tests) noone lives there:—just a few primitives. Hold on, (muffled: “I thought I bloody told you lot to delete all that stuff, it makes us look bad!”) Look, ah, sorry, look I’m a very busy man.”
“Hang on, so, since the time when the First Whities rocked up in 1788 and since 1950 when the whitefella contaminated Emu Plains, Maralinga and the surrounding parts of South Australia including flora and fauna and the residents of nearby Aboriginal Communities, with radioactive fallout (see e.g.: “Aunty Haseldine, 2017 speech”) whitey hasn’t been all that great has he? Also, in perhaps the last 40 years, the whitefella has all but destroyed the Murray-Darling Basin’s viability as a catchment area for clean water essential in turn for the whole ecosystem and the viability of flora and fauna in the region if not man himself. Megadeaths of fish every few years. Gee Whitey is so smart he’s fucked everything up in under 200 years and hes accelerating. So Please Don’t Ask Me How I’ve Been Getting On! Don’t you dare tell us: “If you’re not serving the economy then you must be a drain”. It’s evident that you lot have got some basic misunderstandings, but have the audacity to rock up here and say “Blackfellas are heathen primitives” “Look, they haven’t even invented the wheel yet! ho ho and effing ho!”* Then you proceed to wipe Blackie off the face of the land. Gee, you’re not related to that, Yahoo, are you?”
Is there anything wrong with me because I'm still single?
“Now, look, look, look, they have the right to defend themselves and that’s my last comment on the matter”
He was certainly considered eccentric by some:—but he cautioned: “Thouest shaltest notest confuse an eccentricity of zero with normality”. Alas, the people then, just as the people now, were just bewildered. They assumed countenances indicative of an internal 404 error, aka, at least traditionally, as a “WTF”.
y=x²
Why does my crush make me jealous about having a girlfriend?
In addition he was often obtuse. By studying cartoons on ancient papyrus scrolls it would appear he made advances to members of the opposite sex with lines such as “I’m so obtuse it took me all this time to notice you’re a cutey”. Fortunately this kind of blatantly sexist remark would not be tolerated in today’s world. Nor, of course, would tipping over tables where people, (whose vocation was that of serving the economy) were disrupted, if not terrorised for life. We can’t have a grown man tipping over tables even one. Meanwhile, of course, Israel has the right to defend itself”
“Strange, I’ve been getting that a lot lately. Even when I had the international call with Benji and we got onto discussing the, um, the um throughput per offpeak weekend sort of thing you know the flops per megabit…”
“It had the right to that on Oct7/23 but it failed. That didn’t give it the right to attack it’s neighbours for everyday since. Conducting Blitzkrieg and genocide over the whole of Gaza and now The Lebanon”
What's your favorite stupid joke?
Eg a parabola
“You can’t be serious!”
Jesus, of course, spoke in parabolas. In those days it was like the Beatles at Shea stadium, pretty limited amplification. But being a logical man he figured if he stands the focus he could probably pull off a miracle.
Did Obito ever fully redeem himself in everyone's eyes?
“Hey Whitey, did you know that the Australian Aborigines lived for 65 000 years without money?”
‘Bitrate?”
“Escusez moi but, isn’t calling a Blackfella a “Schmuck”, a kind of anti-antisemitism? And why do they have their own special words for racism applied to them. Noone else in the world does that.”
“Well who’s monitoring your internet access?”
“Explains why I got cutoff the dole 5 times in 3 months”
“Okidoki. L-Y-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm-hm, and, enter! Damn: Computer says no. Hmm, hmm. Well let’s just try “Dorian”. (pause) Yes, that works. Phew! Progress! Ok, so you can go now:—Oh, but, ah, you know, um keep a lid on it, and um, oh yeah: No side to side type motion of any sort. Just giving you the heads up, you know. (hushed) OK so just say your name’s Dorian on the way out and that Asst. Minister Mal McAlpine was assisting with your application today. That’s the one for telling us everything about yourself, if they enquire. Hunky Dory; end of story.”
What are some signs that a therapist may have poor boundaries with their clients?
“Now, look, we’ve been monitoring your mob’s internet use in certain serviced communities and the reports are highly alarming. The wastewater analysis confirms it”
“Its just blank. It’s not even turned on.”
EDIT: A more scholarly view is that the possibly mythical figure referred to in the above as “Jesus”, spoke, in fact, in parabolae. It seems he also often engaged in hyperbole, or got elliptical, and this is a currently a matter undergoing intense scrutiny. An army of ChatGPT bots was selected for this purpose owing to their objectivity.
Women like what they hear while men like what they see, it that true?
“…BITRATE yes! that’s what I said! Anyway I was just enquiring on the um, outbit flowrate, the flowbut outrate for the link up link you up to the invisible part which is in the clouds but so high up that it’s totally invisible and safe as houses. Anyway I think he said the upbit loadrate was about a, um, Jiggabout per Fencepostsecond from the latest douver, you know, lacky, douverlacky. Yeah, so I said, “Oh OK, so it’s sort on a par there with, ah, copper?” And he goes: “You can’t be serious?” I mean, gee we’ve just invested 10 billion into his product and I can tell you right now it’s a very serious endeavour. Very very. Any outward goings are a very serious matter indeed”
“No, that’s what I originally thought too, but don’t you see:—somehow they built a program that doesn’t even put anything on the screen! OMG. It’s so….Israeli!” That’s where the 10 billion goes:—writing code that can do that. God they are a smart bunch”